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-TERRAPIN TODAY-
KASA Space Probes return from 8 year mission to the "Dark Star"

Story and artwork by Thomas Mittemeyer

Siding, Attah. April 25, ATFS (another times forgotten space). KASA is pleased that space probes Stella and Bertha have returned safely from their 8 year mission to the "Dark Star" in the Althea constellation. Being the first mission to approach the star (the only known one of its kind in the universe), and after a 3 year journey to the stellar giant, the probes spent the better part of two years gathering data which KASA (Kesey's Alright Space Adventures) scientists anticipated would reveal information that cant be gathered from our home base here on Terrapin.

One of the most interesting facts in all the stored data from both probes was that indeed, as hypothesized but not known unitl now, is that the Dark Star does pour its light into ashes. Oddly enough, the probes came back with frontal engravings that were almost twin-like, yet different, depicting "Smiling Skulls" with the words "Grateful Dead" adorning their centers.

Also of note, the probes showed no sign of age, wear and tear, or dings from space matter. KASA expected them to have made the trip home on last legs, and was "shocked" that they arrived home looking, according to KASA spokesperson Frank Tower, "in better shape than when we launched them eight years ago."

Tower reported that the probes had a glow about them that will be further investigated as they are rolled away to the Dew of Morning Test Facility for dismantling and analysis. "As crazy as a rooster crowing at midnight" was heard amongst the team of scientists involved in the project. More information will be reported when available. All in all KASA is calling the mission a huge success.

Tower and all KASA DS mission team members thank the state of Atta, the city of Siding, and the residents of Terrapin, whose tax ducats fueled (no pun intended) the mission. Tower also noted in the press conference that "when you (residents of Terrapin) look out at night at that Dark Star 420 million miles distant, remember that you helped fund our largest to date giant leap for mankind."

The next planned tax-funded project by KASA will be an inner-stellar testing of the "New and improved" MOSES® Quasar Flight Suit. KASA said all efforts will be made to ensure that no repeat of the last testings disaster will happen when accidently, Captain Shrubby VanSquidwalker lost his middle finger at the knuckle because the door was ajar.

Reporting for TERRAPIN TODAY
-Tom Mittemeyer

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