• 895 replies
    marye
    Joined:
    Here's the place to talk about our departed loved ones -- friends, family members, tour buddies, and others we've lost along the way.

Comments

sort by
Recent
Reset
  • free idea
    Joined:
    hey Dave
    just saying hi, keeping you in our thoughts
  • tphokie1
    Joined:
    Dave
    You're in our thoughts.
  • johnman
    Joined:
    Loss
    healing vibes your way dave, sorry for your loss, try not to dwell on what was, but know that your dad is not suffering now and we care about you and yours.
  • AugustWest0218
    Default Avatar
    Joined:
    Very sorry Dave
    Best wishes and healing vibes to you!
  • TigerLilly
    Joined:
    Dave
    just know that your feelings are totally human and normal: and expressing what you think is very important when dealing with grief and shock, and all of the other things that you must be going through. Healing vibes to you and yours, and am wishing you strength. Don't be shy to post, whenever you feel the need. ********************************** By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity -- another man's I mean. Mark Twain
  • marye
    Joined:
    how horrible...
    so sorry for all your family's been through.
  • dwlemen
    Joined:
    for Dad
    I guess this isn't the most timely post, but it's one of those sad days and I happened to fall into this group so it kinda seemed appropriate. Just over a year ago my father went over to my sister's house to do some work on the place while she was gone. As it so happened, Dad walked in on a burglar who opted to shoot Dad, take his wallet, and leave him to bleed to death in the hallway. In that instant, everything changed and my world will never be the same. I have for years pleaded with my wife for us to move out of Indiana and to let me go back to school to be a teacher/professor or something (anything to get out of IT). Now, I have to stay here. I can't leave Mom alone, she cannot take care of herself and with Dad gone, she doesn't have anyone else. So, I now swing between being so pissed about the whole situation, and guilt at being so selfish. All this is nothing compared to that last hour or 2 that Dad lay there. Anyway, today is definitely a "sad day" so I thought I'd throw my sorry story up here. -Dave
  • marye
    Joined:
    so sorry for your loss
    healing vibes to all John's loved ones.
  • Hozomeen
    Joined:
    John Grantham
    Hey everyone...My friend John Grantham passed away yesterday. He was 34 years old, and he had a son. I played football in high school with John, and we even lived on the same dirt road. I'm still waiting for details concerning what happened, but really it doesn't matter. He was one of my oldest friends, and now he's gone. Please send out good vibes to his family, and for me you can hoist one, burn one, or otherwise in John's memory. Thanks everyone. MacLain
  • kal
    Default Avatar
    Joined:
    David Lunde
    Portland Meadows. OR. 15 years ago on memorial day he died. If you knew him or know anyone that does or know what happened. Please contact me ... Thanks
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Forums
Here's the place to talk about our departed loved ones -- friends, family members, tour buddies, and others we've lost along the way.
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

Glad for all the times I got to see him. RIP Clarence. Condolences to the band and his loved ones.
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

whose children are missing them today, those that are gone, and those that can't be home.....Bless them all
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

RIP Clarence, thanks ever so much for the music, energy, and spirit. love&peace.
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

Flipping through my old DeadBase VIII, I see that Clarence played saxophone with Grateful Dead on 12/31/88, In Concert Against AIDS on 5/27/89, quite visibly on the 6/21/89 pay-per-view from Shoreline, the Earthquake Relief Benefit on 12/6/89, and then on 12/27/89. If I can find a VHS hi-fi machine that works, I'll slip in the 6/21/89 video!!
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

I had a nagging feeling that the last time I saw you with Bruce in concert (11/2/09) might be the last time ever for me, but never did I really imagine this. You will be missed.
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

Died on June 16th A true original, crazy man, prolific song writer and street singer. How his tuneless ranting could be so catchy and fun I have no idea, but it was. A man with mental illness entertaining, making us smile and laugh with him but not at him. His recording of a jingle for Rhino Records was their first release and the start of their transition from record store to record label. I hope Rhino are paying tribute to him; if not for him they might not be where they are today, hosting the Grateful Dead archive. Farewell Wild Man http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OnHHk9z8iGE
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

SPAM....which I'd like to forget.....
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

My friend Jim lost his wife, Melissa, to cancer this week: It was a long battle and he deserves a break from the frustration & anguish of medical appointments, treatments, and the final path to her death, with help from a hospice. Take a moment to wish him well. Her ashes will soon be dispersed, west of Ward, CO, in some beautiful mountain setting.
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

that's a tough one. Healing thoughts and peaceful times to him.
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

Jim and Melissa will be in my thoughts and prayers......
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

Jim and Melissa will be in my thoughts and prayers......
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

Peace to Melissa, and healing vibes to Jim.********************************** I am not young enough to know everything. Oscar Wilde
user picture

Member for

15 years 10 months
Permalink

I had to put my best friend down tonight. She was a horse in her 30's and lived and awesome life and made mine worth living. Really gonna miss her every day.. :(
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

am very sad and sorry to hear that. My deepest sympathies.********************************** I am not young enough to know everything. Oscar Wilde
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

Spare a thought for my Uncle, Edward Behan, whose funeral is on Monday.A sudden heart attack, no warning, leaving behind a wonderful family with young grandchildren who have yet to comprehend. A real good egg; jolly, with a smile that could guide you safely home. It was Jerry's solo in Estimated Prophet from 5/10/1978 that comforted me when my father died, and no doubt will show the path for my Uncle's soul to the next realm. Campai, Uncle, Campai!
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

for your uncle, his family, and for you jonapi. Lost my dad very suddenly in December, so truly know how it feels! R.I.P. ********************************** I am not young enough to know everything. Oscar Wilde
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

RIP for your uncle, and healing vibes for you and your family.
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

Thank you so much, TigerLilly and gratefaldean. Truly appreciated. A good day all told; his wife, children and their wives strong. A wonderful eulogy, his sons carrying the coffin into the church. All of them linking hands in the beautiful spirit of unity. A real nice family, you know? Nice and tight. Just damn good people. Great to catch up with my Uncles, Aunts and cousins; been far too long since we were all together. Apparently, the inquest was indeed a sudden heart attack; didn't smoke, didn't drink, ate healthily. No warning, no signs. End of another era. But he lives through his wife, great sons and his effervescent grandchildren Let us all burn brightly everyone. Time is indeed shorter than we ever care to realise. While we are here, let us appreciate, understand and study the many levels of existence that await us, seen and unseen. Thank you both once again.
user picture

Member for

13 years 4 months
Permalink

You have my deepest sympathies on the death of your uncle. May the peace which comes from the memories of love shared, comfort you now and in the days ahead.
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

Totmom Casey Anthony just got a free pass with a Not Guilty verdict in Orlando, FL. Her daughter, Caylee, was murdered 3 years ago. Stunning verdict, to say the least. No confessions and no definitive evidence: just a smelly car trunk, a bag of 6 month old bones, and a mom that lied a lot while partying and not contacting police for a month after Caylee vanished. Wonder what will happen to her now, as her home life with the folks might be just a little bit estranged. Perhaps a lucrative book deal will give her a jumpstart, although the taxpayers in Florida will take the hit on Casey's defense legal bill.
user picture

Member for

13 years 4 months
Permalink

I'm always up for sending some healing vibes to those in need of some. I hope you're doing well,my friend. Yes, I am a bit of a rookie on here but I'm loving it so far! The people on here are really chill and its fun to see all the conversations that go on. I'm still trying to get the hang of it! And its ok to ramble, I think that's where the best thoughts come from :) Looking forward to talking more with you and likewise, if you need anything.. shoot me a message. Peace
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

go away
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

Hey, don't speak to mountainjam28 like that, johnman........... he he.
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

spammer sent to the bit bucket where they will not be remembered.
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

It was to the spammer whom dear marye sent to spamhell, where all good (huh?) spammers go. Golly.....I'm not a hassshoe....jeeebers....yek ek ek ek ek ek ek....(popeye laff)..rarrarrf!!! wagwagwag
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

I wanna take her to a show...Mom, ya shouldn't have left so young. Ya didn't meetcher grandson, even....if you were still here, I know my family would not have imploded (or deploded, or hexplowdid, or.....or.... whatever).....Dang it, Mom......just plain MISS you.....aLOT.
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

Yes it was johnman, don't lie!!!!!! Ha ha!!! I know what you mean about missing a parent; i lost my Dad to cancer in 2004. I was at work when i got the phone call. Managed to see him that morning too and told him a joke. Was hallucinating through a Dick's Picks at the time; worked out that the moment he died was just as "Looks Like Rain" started. It sure did Dad, it sure did... But, they've only left the physical plane; sometimes no consolation when you wake up at 2.00am hurting, but they ARE all around us. We just have to readjust our vision; it's time for the peripheral to become our main means of focus; the sidereal our ability to see. Still wish he was here though.....
user picture

Member for

16 years 10 months
Permalink

It was a tumor that got my mom...they tried to cut it out, but that just woke it up, and made it grow. I went home on emergency leave for the surgery, missing a Garcia show onboard the carrier I was assigned to, but it was weeks later that we lost her. I never did get to say goodbye, though I know she's watchin' out for me. It's been almost 25 years and it still hurts... I expect it always will.....
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

((HUGS)) Johnman! And I get impatient with myself for still hurting so for my Dad after 7 months********************************** I am not young enough to know everything. Oscar Wilde
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

so sorry, both of you.
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

Spare a thought for many people today - Including the families with small children that died in a cruiser accident on the River Volga in Russia yesterday. Looks positively awful. The victims of the train crash in Fatephur, India. And the recent severe drought in East Africa. Yep, it's the poor who suffer again. We don't know how lucky we are.....
user picture
Default Avatar

Member for

14 years
Permalink

I lost my Dad 8 years ago. While he was in hospital and after we had been told to expect the worst at any time,I had to attend a meeting 70 miles away ( a sales meeting which the company refused to release me from), I asked the guy in charge of the meeting if I could leave my mobile on vibrate and explained my circumstances, to be told all mobiles must be switched off. When the meeting ended and as I was leaving the building I switched on my phone to see 23 missed calls/messages. It turns out my boss, secretary, wife and sister had been phoning from around half an hour after the start of the meeting to say my Dad had taken a turn for the worse and the end was very near. Luckily after a frantic drive I managed to get to the hospital around 20-30 minutes before my dad passed away, so was with him at the end. However when I think of the anguish and frustration my Mother, sister and wife were put through as they frantically tried to get a hold of me I still feel very bitter that one individual caused them additional grief due to his lack of compassion. On the brighter side, I always try to take something good from what life throws at me, and I truly believe my Dad hung on until I could be with him and share his final moments which I still treasure to this day.
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

Absolutely he hung on riggsjr.You are very lucky that he was surrounded by the ones who loved him in his final moments. Its a huge comfort for the soul after death. For the last images and sensations to be so full of love and compassion in those hours, minutes and seconds before the journey into another realm is so deeply powerful, so precious, that we won't fully comprehend until it's our turn, should we be so fortunate. For me to witness my Dad laughing with a throaty cough on the morning of the day he died, at a perfectly cheesy joke, when he was obviously deeply uncomfortable and wanting to pass over because the pain was too much to take was a blessing i never take lightly. Sometimes i forget, like you do when life continues and the years roll by, but then when it suddenly hits you like a lightning bolt, and they speak to you in your dreams, those tears come from the very pit of your stomach and make you realise that you were a part in something that others only dream of. We are indeed extremely lucky.
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

By the way, my Dad also died 8 years ago. And it does indeed, never go away. Even though they would want it to.
user picture
Default Avatar

Member for

14 years
Permalink

jonapi, thanks for your comments. My Dad was a great music lover and a fine instrumentalist and I still find myself hearing a tune and saying " Oh I must let my Dad hear this" or hearing a really funny story and thinking "must tell my dad that one", these are the times when it hits home most. Does anyone else do that? Like most sons and parents we had our ups and downs but I think that is what makes the relationship grow. Getting over the fall outs and the occasional differences of opinion I think makes the bond stronger.
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

What does one play after exhausting oneself of Fenders and Gibsons? RIP " Steal Your Jazz "
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

R.I.P. I loved your voice, and your talent.********************************** I am not young enough to know everything. Oscar Wilde
user picture

Member for

16 years 1 month
Permalink

21 yrs since we lost brent :( blessed to of seen him. IMO the best pianist i have ever seen and i have played and seen lots. Amazing talent. (~);-)
user picture

Member for

17 years 5 months
Permalink

a dark day...
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

not a fan of her music but sadness for Amy Winehouse.a funny old thing; cracking sense of humour. shame she couldn't drag herself from the hole that is Camden. tight jeans and poseurs, street garbage and cheap alcohol. users and sidewalks of grime. many artists of such a young age have tasted heroin. not many had a camera in their faces or outside their home. congratulations husband and media. troubled, surely, but you played your part. Take care on the other side, Amy.
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

RIP Naoki Matsuda, former Japan football defender. Died from a heart attack at the age of 34. After a brief 15 minute training session he lay down, exclaiming he felt tired and fell into unconsciousness. The club's standby nurse applied heart massage to resuscitate him. While his heartbeat returned, he remained in critical condition in hospital for three days before passing away shortly after 1pm on Thursday afternoon.
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

In memory of Jerry Garcia; another anniversary we could all do without. just seen his beaming smile on the 06/21/89 show at Shoreline and him fumble the lyrics to Touch Of Gray; that'll teach him for getting too excited! grinning away and then losing his place hee! hee! be thinking of you today for sure. http://www.livestream.com/davidaron/video?clipId=pla_8639144558126932321
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

Another year goes byAnother tear in my eye
user picture
Default Avatar
Permalink

Conrad Schnitzler.- Tangerine Dream member and krautrock/electronic pioneer. Joe Lee Wilson. - soulful jazz vocalist who worked with Archie Shepp, Sonny Rollins, Pharoah Sanders, Sunny Murray, Miles Davis and more.
user picture
Default Avatar

Member for

13 years 2 months
Permalink

My best friend died. He had a bad heart. It finally gave out, as he has known it would, since he was a young man. He was 47 years old. Jeff was a genius. He was a jack-of-all-trades. He was also a deadhead...an extraordinary human being. The Grateful Dead family fit his gentle nature perfectly. He loved the music, the people, the natural family that grew out of the friendships he made on the 'bus'... He was able to use his skills and his brain to earn his keep and to help out people along the tour. and he loved the music...there was nothing in life that was too stressful that a Grateful Dead show couldn't cure...no matter how bad the day was, there was always a reason to get up and dance when Jerry was playing... Recently Jeff told me that he was bummed that so many people were needing help these days and he didn't have the means to help them all...he hated the politics that created the wealth divide, making things harder and harder for so many people. it weighed heavily on him. Jeff's heart finally gave out a few weeks ago when he was at Riverbend, his favorite place...his grandparent's place along the big river, where he had loved to play, as a child. He was revived enough for the ambulance to get him to the hospital, but then everything began to fail and he was kept alive on life support. He was non-responsive for a week or so.... Before they let him go, his sister brought in a Grateful Dead cd and as his family stood by him, she, holding his hands, talking to him, turned on the music. they had to smile when they looked down and saw that he was somehow, actually tapping his feet to the beat. the music truly was deep in his soul... They knew it was o.k... they let him go out, dancing... i love you Jeff!
user picture

Member for

17 years 4 months
Permalink

Sorry Sue for your loss: may the 4 winds blow him to a better place. Gr8ful Ted in KC
user picture
Default Avatar

Member for

13 years 2 months
Permalink

Thanks Ted. I'm sure people on here knew Jeff, although not by that name. He often went by Hippie, or alot of times Rider (as he used forms of I Know You Rider for his emails and nicknames). He lived in Nashville. I'm not sure what nick he used on Dead.net. So my hope is that some of his friends here will see this and know that he is gone. He touched many lives in his short but very full life. He was a very good man. I miss him. Thanks for your kind words. sue