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  • tea2trey
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    Not Again
    Been clean on and off since March 2003. Many relapses, I love being clean but when life starts getting good I tend to screw it up. I was very active in AA and just recently NA I love both programs but after some clean time I stop going and it doesn't take much to start up again. Been using little over a week now, stopped going to work, lying to everyone, isolating myself. You know the story. Today has been my "ween down" day. About out of everything. Have Detoxed several times using several methods. I'm ready to clean up again plan is day 1 tomorrow. Thank you deadheads that got clean before me. You have always been very supportive, hope to see you soon. Trey
  • gr8ful_dave
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    San Diego Wharf Rat
    Hiya folks!I just found this board-been doin the 30 days of the dead downloads WOO HOO! Yep-Clean is a tough road-but a worthy one...been at it for 18 1/2 years...clean date 5/15/92. Been to 99 shows, 33 loaded, 66 unloaded... So...with regard to San Diego Wharf Rats...we used to have a "WHARF RAT" specific meeting (all "A"s welcome) at the end of Felspar on da beach at the fire ring on Friday nights at midnight...but it's been a long while since I have been there... Um... Not sure it's good to post an e-mail addy in a public forum, but PM me and we can chat... Peace! Gr8ful_Dave
  • redtony23
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    ???
    Just wondering if anyone's out there. Especially in San Diego. Again, much love to all those living their lives unaltered. Sobriety is not for the timid. How's that song go? "I need a miracle every day!" Well, each one of us IS a miracle every day we wake up SOBER. I know I am. PEACE!
  • redtony23
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    Where'd everybody go?
    My name's Tony and I'm wondering if there's any wharfrat meetings in San Diego, CA. I go to lots of regular meetings, I'm just curious about how many wharfrats are in the area. Sorry Bree, I've never been east of Wyoming myself. Just remember, you never have to drink or use again! "once in a while you get shone the Light in the strangest of places if you look at it right."
  • ripple70
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    Hey bree
    Im in the uk so cant help with the meetings thing sorry,i been clean 17 years so if ya wanna talk,or ican help with anything let me know.Peace sister!!!!!
  • boola
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    Meetings
    Hello everyone :). My names Bree and I was just wondering if anyone knows if there is any Wharf Rat meetings in Michigan or a website I can get a list of meetings at? It would be much appreciated thanks! Take it Easy
  • redtony23
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    long strange trip
    Hello and much love to all of those living their lives unaltered by chemicals! If you're like me, this way of life isn't "natural" (pun intended) and it requires a LOT of diligence and effort. Keep at it, the rewards are beyond measure. I was seven years sober before I caught on to what the Dead are/were about. Leave the chemicals behind. This music is really about transcending this mortal coil for those few precious moments to catch a glimpse of the spirit that exists inside us all. This may sound "mushy" to some, but isn't THAT the reason we used chemicals in the first place?? "Once in a while you get shone the light, in the strangest of places if you look at it right."
  • ripple70
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    some times i dont know how to feel
    I dont really have a problem staying clean its been 16 years now relapse is not an option.I struggle with myself, my feelings think its a self worth thing constantly questioning myself and my actions. Cant get used to this 9 till 5 conformed lifestyle maybe thats what it is who knows.Guess what im saying is its a constant struggle this recovery thing it just gets easier as time moves on much love all what a long strange trip its been.
  • ripple70
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    nice one scuba
    Good for you man!!! much love to you and your family Peace!!!!!! What you are is what your meant to be.
  • scubasteve1
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    Been Around The World And Just Got Back Today !
    The Grateful Dead and The Deadheads saved my life with music,brotherhood and peace at a bad time in my life and I have never forgotten that. Man Iam sure glad they found me ! I once had two good eyes and still could not see ! I have been clean and sobber for over two years now and count myself as a wharf rat. Seen alot of shows and still catching them when I can. A great blessing in my life has been my sugar magnolia and she blessed me with twin girls. They are now three years old now and love music also. My wife let me name one of the girls and I gave her the name Cassidy and her sister's name is Sophia. Peace to All !
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17 years 7 months
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Welcome, Wharf-Rats.
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17 years 6 months
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Hi.. in our area our dmv has a public service ad campaign contest in which teens have produced stop teen drinking PSAs. The finalists, of which our daughter Virginia was one, won a new dell laptop and a new 80G ipod, and then compete to be shown in the superbowl. They are online and are shown on TV for two months, up to right before the superbowl. I am providing the link to it and asking, if you don't mind too much voting for her. ALSO, her voice is the voice, and the two children in it are my son and his girlfriend. Just, asking, so, if you can, please do..it just would be cool to have folks view and vote from all over.. and since we have the extended Dead Family, I thought it would be fun to ask the few boards i go on , like vibes, dso, dead and gdradio and, rukind.. She won't know I'm asking The Family, so it'd be cool if we all voted for her.. all four are there.. the second to last is cool too, from her High School class.. parents own a convenience store and it came out really cool too.. It is very quick and very painless to do.. tom http://www.fox35.com/players/features/lcta/video.shtml
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17 years 5 months
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I checked out the videos and voted for Virginia'a. She did a grate job! I have 2 teen drivers in my house and hope that they always make the right desisions about drinking and driving and NEVER do it!! :) Wish her luck!!
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17 years 6 months
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I voted for it too, but I don't know whether the vote took because the next screen was a survey applicable only to high school students, which I am not. But fingers crossed. Congrats to Virginia on a great job.
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17 years
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Support Organ Donor Awareness-Donate Blood if you can and ALWAYS QUESTION AUTHORITY I have not used for many moons I am grateful to say. I attended the WF meeting in Long Island NY but not in a long while. They are a grate bunch of folks. I still go to meetings of NA and AA. I have gone through Hep C treatment and my viral load is undetectable. I have much gratitude for this!!! I hang out at www.philzone.org hep c support and awareness. This is not 12 step but there is good support if anyone has hep c or knows anyone who has it. If anyone wants to talk about hep c or the state of the universe feel free to contact me Peace RTD
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17 years 6 months
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ya know kids, i have decided a little something. please allow me to share. i'd posted here a bit in july and then my little brother fred died late that month and i really love wharf rats. i am 46, 22 months sober and clean, and full time at iupui. i feel really secure in my sobriety, this is a whole new trip, and i mean it, a trip. i am hearing little idiosyncracities in gd that just were not present as i lived my life inna cloud. ok, i am separating myself from 'the' program, 'a' program; and this is the clincher - i love wharf rats! this is going to be my constant means of keeping in touch and attempting to pass on what i found in sobriety. i do not intend to be a pest or bore anybody, but i am growing up and looking way way ahead in life; further than next tour. i am available and respond to any messages and all notes. this is a simple program one day at a time (ODAAT). indpls. - deer creek. peace, shack
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17 years 5 months
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Tell us whatever is on your mind, and tell us LOUD and strong!!!!!!!!! Nobody's struggles and adventures are being "a pest, or bore" ing anybody!!! 22 months clean and sober-way to go, Brother!********************************** Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you will still exist, but you have ceased to live. Samuel Clemens
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17 years 6 months
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firstly, thanks tigerlilly, is that the design on one of jerry's guitars? ahhhh! i love you already. one thing about strict aa people entails this sense of waiting. i am secure in my sobriety and leaning forward towards life. i am not going to pretend that the doses i gobbled and kind budd that i smoked were a negative thingy. the cult atmosphere of my ex-sponsor is not something i want. i am listening to my recently deceased brother fred's first shows in atlanta '90. by the third night's 'shakedown' opener (4-3), he was hooked. this seems like right now, because it is! this grateful dead stuff is timeless, although i will admit that they are not the best at what they do -- they're just the only ones that do it! i never never could have got this far without aa, but i personally am done with it. within these forums are a bunch of mature deadheads that don't really walk around life with a nitrous balloon anymore. i am not going to pretend that i do not know, i do know! i know that i am going to have a highly productive 2008 and it is going to have lots and lots of grateful dead in it. check out set two opener of the show above; "my time coming anyday!" that day is now, rest in peace freddie with 4-1,2,3-90. peace, shack
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17 years 2 months
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i feel u mr. shack..u know i got 2 years and 10 months clean of all drugs and alcohol. i dont know to much about a.a. my heart is in n.a. .there r alot of faults in the program especialy in the people if u look 4 the faults.as far as the kind bud and acid not being negative i agree..4 me the disease of addiction is in my thought process. the drugs were just a symtom..what is a highly productive year? love u bro more will b revealed to both of us im sure....
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17 years 6 months
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Hey Shack,I feel ya'! Been clean 18 months now. I work the program in NA. I got back into listening to and collecting Dead shows about nine months ago. Until then I had completely missed the internet revolution. The shows I get now are much cleaner than my old tape collection. And with a clear head, I am discovering what truly awesome musicians these guys were (are). I find the music deeply spiritual and profoundly soul satisfying. Most of my NA family don't get it, but some do. FYI, there is an NA group in Longview TX called Grateful Heads. Every summer they have a big anniversary party (I think this year will be number 4). I'm gonna go this year and celebrate recovery with a bunch of brothers and sisters. Keep coming Back! Richard
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17 years 6 months
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I have been clean and going to NA for six months now. I agree there are some faults in the program, but it realy has saved my life. Some of the things that I didn't agree with in the begining ( like, that I had a desease ) make more since to me now. I have got back into the music and life now that I'm clean. I live In central Missouri, the only heads around here are meth heads. It is hard for me to relate to the violence and anger that drug seems to cause in people. Turning them on to some dead and JGB helps me feel at home. peace, robert
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17 years 2 months
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hey their,thats great im two months shy of 6yrs of sobrity.and this journy only unfolds a dayat a time.it took me some getting used to listinig to shows sober and going to shows sober.but the more you do it it'll get easier.just like living sober.the more you do it you change and get a different view on things,it'll finally click.and you just live each moment as you never have before.and thats not to say that life has its ups and downs cause it does ,but my experience has been,you roll w/ the punches and you trust in a power greater than yourself,clean house and work w/another drunk,or in your case addict,and i can promise you life will take on a new meaning.im grateful that your jazzed about your new way of life.feel free to share.this is a disease that needs to be talked to death,backed up with action.continue to embrace the music and shows.you can always catch a fellow sista or bro at a show so your not doin it alone.may you be launched into the 4th dimenson!!!!!way to go.peace.
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16 years 11 months
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wow!!!after reading this i feel like the last addict in the world.but what does sober mean anyway? you can be dependant on nearly everything.feelings,people,moments..etc.nobody is a 100%independant because that would mean he is not connected with live!at least you depend up on oxygene,no???
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17 years 6 months
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HippieChuck-hang tough arthur and jack.there is no law anywhere sayin' you cant still go to meetings,the people are friendly,get a cup o' joe and listen,maybe you'll hear somethin' that clicks..it works that way sometimes.
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17 years 6 months
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... fade away! bop bop bop - bop bop! ya know kids, the gd were and still are a really wide band. in a ton of ways, they had "dimension." that is what i like about not gettin' buzzed just to be able to listen to them. the "trip" i am on now is one that includes the fellas almost everyday. my first song at my first show was a 'bucket.' go figure, i partied ass. wow, i am glad that viewpoint is over. the stance i have on the music now is all about another dimension. no drugs and no alcohol is a way to stand there and listen (and dance) and have this awesome communication with the artists that i care about most in the world. we have all these people out there telling us how to act and who we owe an apology to (something that happened to me inna email) and these people just do not know the vantage point that includes my perspective. i am so lucky to have seen and feel this whole experience from a range of view. i really like the one i am experiencing now. i already did the other stance. it was good then and this is now. what would jerry garcia want me to do. i think to be true to myself and take a look at the world from "over here." ... you know our love will not fade away! have a grateful day! peace, shack
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17 years 2 months
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WWJD...something i picked up from shack's posting...what would jerry do?...and i think i will use it, thanx shack! stay safe and feel good! >><<<< :>
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16 years 11 months
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This goes to all the wharf rats who might be working in a job,where they can be tested on drugs.AND THIS IS NO JOKE!...it has been prooven that if you eat a bagle with poppy seed or a cake with a poppy seed filling and afterwards undergo a drugtest u will b tested positive for opiates..and might loose your job not even knowing why.peace to u guys and stay clean!!!
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17 years 6 months
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HippieChuck -ive heard rumors of the dead possibly touring this summer...am i misinformed,does anyone have that same idea?????
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17 years 6 months
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Just released from a 28 day inpatient. I need all of the support I can get. Hitting an NA tonight. Someone please give me a shout out please. I have to do this. Hopefully see the Wharf Rats somewhere out there. Peace.
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17 years 6 months
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i went to a lot of wonderful shows as a whole bunch of us have. you are experiencing a divine opportunity right now brother. you got a 28 day kickstart into looking at things differently. i am 2 yrs and the clouds have definately cleared. hell, now i hear all these little idiosyncracies that were not in my earbuds before. i suggest you surround yourself with real people that don't have to drink and use shit drugs to see what is so much there already in front of them. our little wharf rat page here had a too long of a gap recently as you may have noticed and i offer the chance as a whole slew of others involved within this thread do to: stay connected. there is a bunch of support here and other places in the real world: if you seek it. stay in "touch" and have a grateful day! peace, shack
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16 years 10 months
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I go to NA meetings in Missouri. Ive been clean 9 or 10 months now but still feel like a newcomer. I havent started working the steps yet but the meetings still help me stay on the right path. Drop me a line if you ever need to talk. Keep coming back! Robert
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17 years 6 months
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I went to my first rehab program in 1983, and was clean for about a year. But old habits kicked in again, and I was a bad boy until 1998, a few months here and there clean and sober, but nothing permanent. I was not happy where my life was at that point, and finally wanted to lift the fog and haze from my life, and now 9 years clean, and serene, something I am glad I did. I will never go back. I attend a meeting or two a week still, to keep my program working. But it took many a night talking to my sponser till dawn, and a dozen meetings or more a week, and this worked for me. Deadheads are rare in the UK, let alone one's that are Wharf Rats, but I sure wish that there was one at least that could understand seeing shows, loving the music and people/scene. I miss that part of my life. Keep your program working and go to lots of meetings.Peace.
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17 years 6 months
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Just wanted to say thanks for the feedback and support. For the first time I'm talking about it and picking up the phone. I'm 41 yrs old and about to start a new journey. It's about time. The month rehab really helped, something I was always against. I think it might have saved my lilfe. I just have to stay the course. What a feeling waking up with a clear head. Peace
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17 years 5 months
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My first show was 4/6/85 in Philly, and I loved it, I was on the bus right away. Now I am happy to say, and be able to realize what I am saying it, (!!) that I'm still on the bus, but I also got on the wagon!, 3 years 3 months clean and sober.The Grateful Dead is ALL about the music, the sound, the togetherness. It's not about what you can get in the lot that will totally annihilate you. I want to read through all these posts, but I just trekked into the forum for the first time tonight and I'm a bit tired. Glad to know everyone is out there!! Stay strong, stay sober and listen to the music play!!! Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!
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17 years 2 months
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welcome and keep up the hard work.... stay safe and feel good! >><<<< :>
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17 years 5 months
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Soooo I'm trying to find any real Wharf Rat presence on the net...and all the last mentions seem to be around 01 and 02. Any suggestions? I've been sober since october 17 2001 (and still go to meetings regularly) and SINCE then I've been to over 50 shows (RatDog/phil/TOO/Dead/DSO/Rhythm Devils/VW&F, etc.)...My family and I go to as many festivals each summer as possible, BUT I'd really like to get some kind of Wharf Rat community re-jumpstarted. Does anyone know how to access that AOL "rose garden" wharf-rat-meeting deal? I appreciate all responses. PS> Jerry was IT for me man...I even named my children after GD lyrics...there is nothing in the wolrd like those cascading arppegios....BUT not once in the 20+ shows I saw w/Jerry...did I have the kind of spiritual experience I've had at shows w/out him, SINCE I've been sober.-evan
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17 years 5 months
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Anyone got spring fever? I joined our local dead head meetup but no upcoming meetings as of now. I know Donna Jean is on tour, any other recommended road trip shows for this spring and summer?
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17 years 6 months
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hey kids, we are creating a lapse in "wharf rat page" responses again. i am not too sure that the little practice of doing that is too too good. meanwhile, after a while i felt like a bicycle was not gonna be a trigger for me. therefore i gotta new mt. bike. deadly on the road to school etc. ahhhh!!! i used to get all alcoholically buzzed with a glazed window of marijuana smoke and try to ride. sure i got it done, but the clear visionary thru these new "eyes of the world" is just so different and mo' betta!!! whew!!! i don't plan on tryin' to be sneaky and carry a cocktail today; so i will just get out the good old grateful dead and check out how wonderful this ride to class is sober. 1991 "deal" MSG, NYC. have a grateful day! peace, shack
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16 years 7 months
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I'm Brian, a Wharf Rat from Chicago (and elsewhere). Currently stuck in Lodi. Any of the folks from Indy's own "Rats NA Drain Ditch" around? Or anyone else who just wants to say hey? Glad to have found the joint. Hope to keep coming back. Brian
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16 years 11 months
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so you went to school drunk and before you got on your bike had yourself a little "J",well brother thats your own fucking problem.alcohol and weed dont work well together,and if you have not understood this after the 1st time you came puking and with your brain turnin around like a wheel..to school than this is even worse,because it shows you dont learn from experience.but please dont mingle the Dead into your own uncapacity to learn,and stop chanting poems on how incredible the GD are when youre not drunk like a pig.oh,and what did you invent ,a special way of dead-talk?maybe that was necessary because drunk and on weed you must have been hard to understand..cheers:-)(-:
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17 years 6 months
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this is a topic for people in the Wharf Rats to talk amongst themselves and help each other out, not for others to give them a hard time and make fun of them. This topic will quickly lose its value if people don't feel safe posting here. Please stop. Thank you.
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17 years 7 months
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I know well that Frankly meant no harm, but this just isn't the place.
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16 years 9 months
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SHONINSFI'm in S.F. Thats San Francisco folks.This is where it all started, and I go to a Warfrat meeting and there is only one other "KID"there besides myself there whats up with that???? Where is the FAMILY!?!
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16 years 7 months
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Good morning. I'm just up the road from you a little ways in Lodi. I've heard of the SF Wharf Rat meeting, but have not yet attended. Used to go to a Friday night Wharf Rat meeting in Indy when I lived there, and we didn't have too many "kids" there, either. I think that it's mostly because we're an older crowd overall, so our meetings tend to attract older folks. Hopefully it's not that us old guys are scaring people away. I think that it's really just that the scene isn't there attracting folks any longer, so new blood doesn't really get mixed in with us remnants. Just my impression. Hope to see you around. Perhaps I'll find out more about that SF meeting and show up some day. Brian
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17 years 6 months
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hey kids! well, "frankly" really laid into poor little shack, boo hiss! i am sober sober and i can not let idiots like that destract me from my mission. i am engaged into the wharf rat page here. if anyone cares to look; after a lapse of any sort when nobody is posting, i try to put our choo-choo back on track. thanks to marye for sticking up for me. my post was in no way to promote those fu days. i am saying that things are better now, for a while i did not even want a bike. i am getting pretty disappointed here tho. good luck all and have a grateful day! peace, shack
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17 years 4 months
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Are the Warf Rats still going to shows like Phil and Friends? I didn't see any the last time I went to a Phil show. I have hung out at the Warf Rat baloons more than once though, but it would be nice to see them out in full force again. I've been clean and sober this time 3 and a half years. I've been trying to get clean since ninety though, so I feel like my recovery is always very fragile. Maybe this time I have a handle on it. Seattle Head, Zelda
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17 years 6 months
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had been very involved with the rats in the late 80`s early 90`s,way before tables were admitted to shows.. i then met a woman,who was/is a pothead,stopped working my program,and ended up going back out to insanity for about 13 years..fortunately enough i didnt kill myself,and was able to crawl back, beaten broken and bankcrupt.. now i am back 100+ days or so,looking to pick up (sobriety) where i let off.. would appreciate any/all contact from clean/sober individuals, especially with info reguarding gatherings at summer festivals.. live in nyc area,if anyone wants to hook up for travel,please let me know.. ive used up all of my 9 lives,and cant possibly afford another slipup... "nothing left to do but---> smile...." mike (nj)
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16 years 10 months
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Hi Mike. Nice to meet you. My name is Robert, I live in Sedalia MO. There are no wharf rat meetings here, just NA. Its good to see some new people checking out this forum. Send me an email if you ever need to talk. Peace, Robert
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17 years 6 months
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brothers and sisters, i haven't checked the page for a couple of weeks and wow! positive vibrations, rastaman vibration! mike, what you said was well put and to the point. dude, you are welcome to write me 24/7. if i take my eye away from reading wrats page and i could be next to slip. things are way cool and much mo bettah without booze for me. and then my brethern in the post before me reaches his hand out; killer! and "z" before that kicks around some more positive "+" signs. in monty python dialect; "very nice!" ahhhh, it's everywhere: + + + +, it? them! + + + + +'s . hey my dear friends, keep connected because that is helping me at this very moment. anybody email me, anytime. in closing: this art student dude at iupui gave me this beat up cd with garcia/ grisman scratched on it in sharpie. i was checking this little fragile morsel out and knew those selections at first; then zap-ola! some solo robt. hunter with an acoustic terrapin, get this, really; 15 minutes and 51 seconds! love! blah blah more songs, then this jgb tune with jer bear doing "when smoke gets in your eyes!" i am honestly not certain i have heard it ever. in the back of my mind, i knew it was in the jumble of jgb repertoire. i had to tell ya all this. have a grateful day! peace, shack
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16 years 7 months
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after years of struglin on junk n countless attempts of getting clean somthin finally clicked in my head like i want to stay alive to go to the next show but that does not mean this is goin to b easy (though im not sick(physicaly) still cant sleep right at night) i know this will pass with time but ineed more thn that i need t talk to some family that under stands what its about im in north jersey(sommerset county) so if any ne on wants to chat pm me please i also would like to hit some phil n friends or some bobby this summer but i know i need to b around clean fam for this to work peace out bear
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16 years 7 months
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Hey man - thatz awesome and congratulations. 30 days is long time. I have been a wharf rat for over 11 years.
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17 years 4 months
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I was wondering if the Bobby show in Seattle will have the Wharf Rats there. I know to look for the yellow baloons, but last time I looked I didn't see any.Zelda
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16 years 6 months
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are there any wharf rats in northern VA? do they meet at shows around this area? i know phil is coming to richmond on tuesday i will be going. hopefully i will find wharf rats there. is anyone going to floyd fest grisman is playing and i was hoping other wharf rats are going. i am a 22 year old male hoping to have an enjoyable sober summer, after i was strung out on heroin last summer.
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17 years 5 months
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I went to the Phil show in Penns Peak (excellent show! killer 3rd set!!) and the Wharf Rat table sure was there! When I first went to shows in my early sobriety, it was tougher. The more time I have the easier it gets. Finding the table with the yellow balloons helps becasue it reminds me I'm not the only one out there. And this forum does too. Nothin' left to do but smile, smile, smile!
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17 years 6 months
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hey kids, my monthly type of post here. i think that keeping in touch really helps me keep my new life rolling. well, my 79 yo father passed away this week last. he just got sick and sicker. being sober for this helped me realize again that it is not about me. i am not the center of the universe in how leon's death reflects upon our baby blue earth. i have obligations as a deadhead to extend my hand to his wife, my drunken and distraut sister and who else may be somewhat shattered. i recently sent him a copy of acoustic reckoning live 1980, whew. i recall calling him on father's day 1988 before i headed up to alpine valley that sunday. perhaps that knockin' encore can shatter my frickin' bones inna commemorative way that the gd do do so well. i am so lucky to be sober to assess things in a tight arrangement (the good old grateful dead). thanks for any meditations and prayers, but i do not type this in order to create any excuse to use - it ain't about me! have a grateful day! peace, shack
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17 years 7 months
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so sorry for your loss, and stay strong.
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16 years 6 months
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hello out there! I am 3 1/2 months into sobriety and recently found out about the wharfrats via a reference in a discussion meeting. have been a deadhead for many years - first show may 25, 1974! loving my new life and looking forward to seeing my first show (tba) sober!! are there any wharfrats out here in the phoenix area, esp. east valley? looking forward to checking back to this forum!
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16 years 5 months
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Looking for anyone near the Clearwater, FL area who is a Rat or knows any close!!!!!! New to sobriety 14 days in and read about the Wharf Rats in the Annotated Dead Lyrics. Have been a deadhead for 16 years know. Anything I can still keep learning and experiencing is a great honor from a great man, band, and fans!!!!!!