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    marye
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    In one of the other topics, one of the folks seemed not to be so sure of the reception he'd get for saying he was a youth minister at his church. In my experience, Deadheads span the full spectrum from Agnostic to Zoroastrian. I've met atheist Deadheads, Muslim Deadheads, Buddhist Deadheads, Catholic Deadheads, Jewish Deadheads, and Wiccan Deadheads. My Deadhead friends are all over the map on this stuff, and as far as I'm concerned one of the real richnesses of the scene is the ability to see how things look to other folks and, sometimes, experience it from their world. Believe it if you need it, if you don't, just pass it on. But talk about it here, and please maintain a safe respectful place to do so.

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  • GRTUD
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    Nice Job, TL...
    couldn't have said it better, myself. "The need for mystery is greater than the need for an answer." - Ken Kesey
  • TigerLilly
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    Happy Trails
    Nobody asked you to accept anything. You are welcome to believe and accept what you chose to, that has been the main gist of this thread so far lately. We are just discussing here. BUT calling other peoples' thoughts and writings "bullshit" because they are different, is uncool. The Gnostic Gospels exist, and actually pre-date what are now accepted by the church as the "true" gospels. Could argue that the 4 gospels coincide due to collaboration, and time going by before they were written. Just because something is widely "accepted" does not necessarily make it true. Am sure that you accept that the world is round, which was thought to be "bullshit" at one point in time. And am not arguing with you here because I necessarily believe in the Gnostic or ANY gospels, for that matter, but because you used to word "bullshit" about the collection. Is one of the dangers of religion that bugs me-aggressive reactions to thoughts, ideas and writings that are not widely-accepted ********************************** Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you will still exist, but you have ceased to live. Samuel Clemens
  • free idea
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    God means "good"
    hey, little bri, thanks for your thoughtful comments on my post. It always gives us a chance to be more clear, when someone actually listens to us and engages our thought. You said: [ The intelligence to me is not God. If there was a God that created life on earth, who created God? ] Yeah. Maybe I can be more clear. To me God is just the word "good" in German. It's just another word like, spirit or mind, to refer to reality. I reject all other meanings for myself. So, i could of said, "that intelligence, i call it 'good', And noone else has to agree with me, that's just what i call it. And for me, Intelligence or "good", definitely didn't create life on earth, cause that would mean he/she created something finite and mortal, and that would just wreck everything. For me, God didn't make us as mortals, he/she made us as immortals. It's us who agree to see ourselves as mortals, which i definitely don't recommend. So, for me, there is just one Truth, with lots of words to refer to it, the most charged being God. But it's just a word that means good, to indicate that this intelligence is 100% good. So, then, what do we do with all this sense information indicating otherwise. I treat all that as delusion, hallucination. To me, any sense that Life (eternal, infinite, immortal) could be in ,or inhabit a body (mortal, finite), is impossible. But liitle bri, i don't mean you or anyone else has to agree with me. i love where you're at in your thought, and how you listened and responded. In my thought, the light is ALWAYS shining, and God will never be on my side or anyone's side, we have to be on God's side, or on the side of good. with all respect for your views- andy
  • grdaed73
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    got 5 billboards..
    around the valley of the scum here, say" Imagine No Religion"!............ seems i've heard that before somewhere! but hey, can't we all just get along? oh yeah, thats what religion is about........... isn't it? peace4all, imagine!
  • starsleeper
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    little one,with love
    You might not believe in GodBut that makes you the one that's odd It's not uncommon, in your youth To search for answers and for Truth My friend before you were born We'd been to Dead shows, had hearts torn And we've all searched to find a way To try and make it, one more day Unless you die early, you'll find pain That turns the sunshine all to rain Will you deny, or will you pray When death comes and takes it all away So if you ever can believe There's more to life than we can see I hope you'll get down on your knees And thank the one who sets you free
  • starsleeper
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    gospel discrepincies
    I've been reading the Gospels for 15 years and I'm quite comfortable with whatever there is within the 4 accepted ones. If they all said exactly the same thing I would "not" believe them. The teachings of Jesus are close enough considering how long they were written after he died for us. The real discrepancies only occur when the gnostic gospels come into the picture. So don't tell me I need to accept whatever bullshit comes along just because it had Jesus name in it. Love ya.
  • TigerLilly
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    "if we hae an open mind and an open heart
    we are allowing oursevles to have a religious experience no matter where we are". I am soooo digging that, littlebri. Your who created God question is reminding me of the chicken and the egg question quite alot. You have said in a few short sentences, a very concise summing up of vague thought have had inside for years. And agree with you that intelligence is less "God" and perhaps even quite the opposite of what you said about religion being when we feel invincible (brilliantly said, btw). Kinda suspect that the word God is a belief for when we do NOT feel invincible, but kinda small and helpless. But have to think about it more, again just a first thing in the morning-brain half awake gut-inspired response. ********************************** Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you will still exist, but you have ceased to live. Samuel Clemens
  • littlebri
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    nicely said free idea... but,
    The intelligence to me is not God. If there was a God that created life on earth, who created God? Reality is not nothing, but rather, another thought or an idea. It just takes a pair of open eyes and an open heart to see this reality, and you portrayed that very well. Everything is interconnected and if we have an open mind and an open heart we are allowing ourselves to have a religious experience no matter where we are. Religion is just a belief, and this belief, in my opinion, is centered around the ideas that we have and the emotion that embraces a moment in time when we feel invincible. ~littlebri
  • Gypsy Cowgirl
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    "Feeling Alright".....
    Alright! Hal R-sounds good to me-I also liked "Mr. Natural" created by Robert Crumb, the cartoonist.......Sounds very Native American, which their ancestral religion has always been interesting to me & made way more sense than any other organized religion. Besides which being the best envionmentalist........."gotta go now".....ps-The Ice Cream Kid-one of my all time faves! Gypsy Cowgirl
  • Hal R
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    late night thoughts
    Swiming naked in a mountain lake is my kind of praying and Dark Star is my kind of hymn, Zippy is my kind of preacher and nature is my father and mother and the holy spirit is art and the son is the peace and love that comes through this and happy trails are grate but sometimes there are rattlesnakes on them and then you may just bump into a friend there that you haven't seen in a long time because you both love the same wilderness. If the doors of perception were cleansed, everything would appear to man as it is, infinite. William Blake
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In one of the other topics, one of the folks seemed not to be so sure of the reception he'd get for saying he was a youth minister at his church. In my experience, Deadheads span the full spectrum from Agnostic to Zoroastrian. I've met atheist Deadheads, Muslim Deadheads, Buddhist Deadheads, Catholic Deadheads, Jewish Deadheads, and Wiccan Deadheads. My Deadhead friends are all over the map on this stuff, and as far as I'm concerned one of the real richnesses of the scene is the ability to see how things look to other folks and, sometimes, experience it from their world. Believe it if you need it, if you don't, just pass it on. But talk about it here, and please maintain a safe respectful place to do so.
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I recall Mickey Heart wearing a shirt that said "God is Sound." Has anyone here ever been to Spain and wondered why the Spanish have so many delicious topas made of pork? I am talking hundereds if not thousands or topas made of port. When i left Madrid i looked into this and found out the real reason why this is. Does anyone know why? I agree with Mickey, God is Sound!
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What do the Chrishnas belive in? I had a few bad experiences with them so i was always affraid to actually ask. Has anyone found themselves to be so spun and helpless that you followed the big maroon bus only to find youself being brainwashed? We can help and convert you all at the same time!! Buy one get one free!!!
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Why cant you just go to sleep thinking"oh,some people believe in buddha,some into the dalai lama and some even in jesus,god what jerks ..how lucky am i to believe in money and to be one of the chosen few,(sigh of relief)!":-)(-:
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"Mickey Heart is God" but I recently crossed out Mickey's name and replaced it with "John Molo". It was a cheap knock off from China, anyway. "Since you've all been such good boys and girls, I would like to take everybody in this entire audience out for milk and cookies. There are buses outside. Everybody follow me."
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That was good. LOL
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Shipping powders back and forthSinging black goes south while white comes north And the whole world full of petty wars Singing I got mine and you got yours. And the current fashions set the pace. Lose your step, fall out of grace. And the radical he rant and rage, singing someone got to turn the page And the rich man in his summer home, Singing just leave well enough alone But his pants are down, his covers blown And the politicians are throwing stones So the kids they dance they shake their bones Cause its all too clear were on our own Picture a bright blue ball just spinning, spinning free Its dizzying, the possibilities. ashes, ashes all fall down.
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GRTUD, I was just reading back through the Thread and saw some of your posts. This is good stuff and really shows just how foolish this stuff is. cheers.
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Glad to see that someone is checking the stuff out I posted. Thanks! Also fyi, Colbert will have The Roots on his show this week, as they broadcast live from Philadelphia! This will be only the second time in the show's history that a musical guest makes an appearance. Last week (or so) REM appeared live as both (collective) guest and performing artist. Also, have you seen the most recent (real) news on China, regarding Taiwan? Perhaps we will have something to celebrate, after all. Photobucket "Since you've all been such good boys and girls, I would like to take everybody in this entire audience out for milk and cookies. There are buses outside. Everybody follow me."
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to see that this guy is the head of the Human genome project.and beside being a believer he is a shameless liar too....parts of genes are patented nearly every week!Great show ,we could use that in tcheque rep.:-)(-:
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Yes we are making some progress. The Kuomintang has not had direct relations with the Communist since the end of the Civil war (1949) and the founding of the "peoples republic." This is something we can call the Ying and the Yang right? Shit hitting the fan in Tibet and Miracles happening in Taiwan. Let’s hope that in the end everything works out because things have been heating up in the Taiwan Straits in the past 4 years. Colbert is the man. I will try to find the show where the roots are playing. I used to see them back in Portland, Oregon when they used to play at the rosland ballroom and the Boulder Theater in Col. Thanks for the heads up.
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They probably haven't gotten around (and around) to mapping YOUR DNA yet... be patient. : - ) I'm honesty not knowledgeable about the patent process, regarding DNA. I hear different "facts" from different people and I just can't keep up with all the legalize (nor can my brain absorb the constant droning of "news" which, in these type situations, amounts to welfare for lawyers - in the US, at least). Can you provide further info? "Since you've all been such good boys and girls, I would like to take everybody in this entire audience out for milk and cookies. There are buses outside. Everybody follow me."
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Jesus here … I have a message for all of you from beyond your realm. This is a Message from Jerry, Pigpen, Brent, Keith, and Bill. To all you who have taken this site and made it about personally attacking one another; who have made a point to forget about the music completely, who have disregarded what this web site is all about. You all have disappointed us greatly. Remember it’s about the music and what it means to each and every one of you. Stop the personal attacks against one another. There is a lot going on in this world right now. And not everyone is going to agree with each other on what should be done. The end of days is near. We need to come together and be united. No I’m not from the Chinese government. I have nothing to do with any government. Nothing we say on these forums about the world is going to change anything. Pray to who or what you believe in. At this point unless you are going to the different places or raising money to help fund these causes; all you can do is pray. So QUIT your bickering it’s time to get along and enjoy the music while we still have the freedom to listen to it. And Remember why we are here on this site in the first place!!!!
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u do this everywhere? post ur shit once please, ur wasting alot of peoples time and THAT is a sin!
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this is the 1st time i only can agree with you,and you have said it so nicely.No pression,inquisition or other madhead catholic shit.but this does not mean that i believe that i am chatting with jesus.right now i am chatting with Jerry about catfish John..take care brother!.-)(-:
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i was reading your post on this site,and my tolerance-indicator told me that i can write you a friendly message..BUT then i see that you surf around on other sites with your message...changed just a little!!JC..when my boy was small i told him that lying to people aint no good.and in your case especially if you are god,or his son?or your father?or both togther..whats the holy spirit for in that game any way...HHTFs,so you can do that yourself:-)(-:
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local media have reported that General Reza Zarei was found with six naked women in a house of prostitution in the Iranian capital last month.Gen Zarei was in charge of enforcing Iran's strict anti-vice laws, which include a ban on prostitution. and this a tightly religous country...go figure musta thought 6 pros in the flesh was better than 13 virgins in spirit (is it 13 or 30?) "Taste eternity", the swords sing
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its neither the one or the other.its 74 virgins......:-)(-:
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lamere numbers,frankly! kinda like religions{:[(~
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Stick to one forum for your posts jc...I do not need to read the same thing on all forum its annoring! Keep the Peace :)
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Actually, in the Shia religion (please correct me if this applies to the Sunni sect or any other) and in Iran especially you can have sex with women as long as you are married to those women. So as clever as the religious order is, they have set up government/with the blessings from above of course/institutions where you can marry a prostitute and then have sex and then divorce her after you are finished with your non-holy duties. And the contradictions continue..................
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Pope praises U.S., but warns of secular challengesBy Sheryl Gay Stolberg and John Sullivan Published: April 17, 2008 WASHINGTON: Pope Benedict XVI addressed American Catholic bishops on Wednesday evening and praised the United States as "a land of great faith." But he cautioned that the country's secular tradition often led to a gradual separation of religious guidelines from daily life and an acceptance of divorce, abortion and cohabitation outside marriage. "Perhaps America's brand of secularism poses a particular problem," the pope said, according to the prepared text of his speech. "It allows for professing belief in God, and respects the public role of religion and the churches, but at the same time it can subtly reduce religious belief to a lowest common denominator." Speaking after a prayer service at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception, Benedict told the gathered bishops that the church must establish its teachings as central to people's daily life.
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So how does the Pope explain the Pedophile Priests who are feeding on our children? Are they secularist who have reduced religious beliefs to the lowest common denominator? The reason why there are so many pork Topas in Spain is because of the Spanish Inquisition where the monarchy attempted to convert the Jewish and Muslim populations to Christianity. After a while they realized that the Jews and Muslims who were freshly converted were faking the whole thing. So as Jews and Muslims do not eat pork , they came up with a cruel system that would inform them if the freshly converted soul was lying or not. If the Jew or the Muslim did not eat the array of beautiful topas (which were made of pork) that was presented to them, then they were sentenced to a cruel death. Pope John Paul actually apologized for this (and many other atrocities of the Catholic Church, like supporting the Nazis in order to gain revenue and access to the schools across Germany and "Greater Germany). The list goes on and on. Chew on this Jesus
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Can you imagine the expressions when those poor souls find out, that due to a translation error, they're in store for 74 Virginians? Around the Capitol Beltway, that fate is considered Hell. "Since you've all been such good boys and girls, I would like to take everybody in this entire audience out for milk and cookies. There are buses outside. Everybody follow me."
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Around the Beltway there is more sin than anywhere else in the country. It seems that there is always some male House of Rep or some male Senator partaking in extracurricular activity that goes against the morals or principles that even the most liberal minded person can ever think of. What was the guys name from Idaho (I-da-hoe in this case). One of the main characters in the impeachment trials of Clinton was caught by the FBI soliciting sex from young males at the airport in Boise. Fuck!!! And there are many more stories to go around. 74 or 73 virgins would not be that much fun anyway!! You spend the rest of your time in the clouds teaching them and this is not what I call heaven!!!! If there were 74 experienced girls there then I would find god.
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GRTUD,..V-I-R-G-I-N-S!!!The 74 Virginians you are more likely to meet them in the Big-House:-)(-:
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Hey trifecta,It was the Minneapolis airport and it was airport security that busted him, but basically a true story.
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from the introduction to this topic: "Believe it if you need it, if you don't, just pass it on. But talk about it here, and please maintain a safe respectful place to do so." Several recent posts bashing other people's religions have violated both the letter and spirit of this, and I put on my mod hat and say Please Cut It Out. I am not for the present going in and nuking existing posts, but further posts along the general lines of Muslim-bashing, Catholic-bashing, and the like with regard to any religion, including atheism and secularism, will be summarily nuked. Believe what you want, but leave others alone to do likewise.
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His name is Larry Craig. I have met him on several occasions and organized demonstrations against him and his forest policies back in the 90's. Watching his downfall is something I have had great interest in. If the doors of perception were cleansed, everything would appear to man as it is, infinite. William Blake
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Man in a Purple Dress -- Pete Townshend How dare you wear a robe to preside How dare you cover your head to hide Your face from God How dare you smile from behind your beard To hide the fact your heart's afeared, And wave your rod How dare you be the one to assess Me, in this God-forsaken mess You, a man, in a purple dress A man in a purple dress You are all the same Gilded and absurd Regal, fast to blame Rulers by lost word Men above men, or prats With your high hats You priest, you mullah so high You pope, you wise rabbi You're invisible to me Like vapour from the sea How dare you? Do you think I'll quietly go? You are much braver than you know For I can't die Your staff, your stick, your special cap They'll protect in Hell? What crap! Believe the lie How dare you be the one to assess Me, in this God-forsaken mess You, a man, in a purple dress A man in a purple dress When you place your frown Between my God and prayer However grand your crown Or dignified your hair Men above men, or prats In your high hats You priest, you mullah so high You pope, you wise rabbi You are invisible to me Like vapour from the sea I lovingly mock you noble lords We all dress up to grant awards I do that as well I dare condemn your fashion sense At least you're not astride a fence That would not sell But I will deliver this address Your soul's condition don't impress You, a man, in a purple dress A man in a purple dress when we saw The Who a couple of years ago, Pete commented on how this song was not about religion, but about judgement. peace.
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Thanks CCJ I love The Who and never heard that!
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JESUS LOVES,JESUS FORGIVES,and JESUS died for our sins. PEACE & always BE KIND..
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glad you liked it Mom, for other Who fans, the name of the album is Endless Wire. more info to follow in a private message. peace.
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had posted a question here, but seems to have gotten lost. As don't feel like retyping it, will wait and see whether turns up********************************** Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you will still exist, but you have ceased to live. Samuel Clemens
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How'd a person get a name like Hunter, anyway? No doubt there is a God, is all I can say. Well, besides, "Thank You"... "You know what the trouble about real life is? There's no danger music."
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Wow! I don't think I expected to see these kinds of posts here! I thought it was obvious that the Grateful Dead experience (at it's best) WAS church!!! I thought most people knew that they were singing folk songs to their "people", describing our reality, validating our experience, giving us hope to go on, providing inspiration and connection, ritual and symbol, JUST LIKE CHURCH - except FULL OF LIFE, NOT EMPTY RITUAL!!! For me, after being exposed to everything from fundemental Christianity (my dad's side) to Budhism, American Indian, TM (I even met the Maharishi!), est., and Wicca (my mom's influence), I started to see how all these beliefs really just emphasize different points of the same truth. I started to see how, once you combined their teachings, threw out the political bias that men wrote in, and focused on the similarities, one truth started to emerge... the path to spiritual awakening, the connection to the higher force that created you and all life, is found by living a fully authentic and passionate life. You can only find your individual path to connecting with the creative force by going within, NOT looking to some middle man for answers. Later, I discovered that Carl Jung and Joseph Campbell described this path as the process of individuation. Campbell even hung out with members of the Dead and confirmed that the shows were spiritual in nature, full of "living ritual". For me, the members of the Grateful Dead, through their support staff, acted as a conduit of energy (at the best points). They seemed to channel something greater through their ability to let go and let the music control them. When we, as the audience, joined that energy through dance or some other form, we amplified it and sent it back. In this way, an energy loop was created that lifted us ALL up (even those that didn't know what was going on). But for many of us... this process was CONSCIOUS!!! When I was able to pariticipate in this experience, this transformation and projection of energy, there was NO DOUBT in my soul that it was a spiritual experience. I think too many people get tied up in the religions of old. They forget that these religions were created not just to provide spiritual connection, but also to reflect and support the social and political motives of the people that controlled them. It concerns me when people disregard the teachings of Jesus and other prophets to be true to their own connection to God in order to follow the rules that MEN made up as a means of control hundreds of years ago. "live a life you love, use a God you trust, and don't take it all too seriously..."
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wow mtfreak ,, defanatley food for thought..going to shows was like a (religous) experience for me also .. " just a box of rain beleive it if you need it if you don`t just pass it on "
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"It concerns me when people disregard the teachings of Jesus and other prophets to be true to their own connection to God in order to follow the rules that MEN made up as a means of control hundreds of years ago."
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I'm still convinced that "Jerry is God" and "God is Sound". Seriously, I get my meditation time in while listening to Jerry and to the Dead. I always feel that hit from the divine spirit when I tune in. Thanks, guys!
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when reason ends faith begins! when faith ends, reason ends! it's like a wind dat catches ur breath wen samtings wrong!!! faith arises wen love reigns!!! itz a puzzle hidden behind d buckle bars who simply undefined perceptive power... its a faith called the magnification life brings wen things go wrong...am jaz a woman, idealistic but id rader be on my own rader dan c tings go not my way! if fixing problems is so sucked, i cud definitely go blind... wat f ders destiny, wat f ders hope! id rader be myself beating hardly drawn dan put tings lie on alone....
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Well said wolfsong, I too have been gratified to discover I am not the only Chrisitan Deadhead! My experience of the Grateful Dead helped solidify the idea that "its all church, man, if you take the time to see it, hear it, feel it". Thank you for your eloquence. Peace my brother.
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i tink eye mite egree wiv u f i cd jes derstan sackly wut yu sez dere ;-)
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Oh give me a home where the buffalo roamWhere the deer and the antelope play Where seldom is heard, a discouraging word And the skies are not cloudy all day
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Read the following book: A short history of nearly everything by Bill Bryson. 570 pages (and another 100 pages of citations). This book will help one understand everything that happened from the Big Bang to the rise of civilization. After reading such books, then try to fit any of the organized religions into the equation. I was brought up a Catholic and after reading the Old Testament i realized that if there is such a God why is he then iso evil and why would i follow such nonsense. (the old testman is borrowed from Jewish texts and is full of Blood, Murder, Incest, etc) I can comment about the New Testament but i will conclude with saying that organized religion is our tradition and is an acceptable way to remember our cultures, but most of the time religious people tend to not realize this. I love Christmas and all the holidays and i even had my daughter baptized out of respect for my tradition. If we look at the facts and the evidence everyone would realize this and respect what is in front of our faces/our reality so to speak and not leave it all behind because after one dies he or she will hang in the clouds listening to an angle playing a harp. I’m in Sierra Leone and went to a place called Banana Island, long story short it is one of the largest ports used during the slave trade. If there was a god why would he allow a church (which is convently set with a perfect view of the loading docks)to bless the slave trade and oversee the slaves before they were shipped off like widgets to the Americas? If there was a god why would he allow "his chosen people" to almost be exterminated by the Nazis? I have at least 170+ questions like these. Why Why Why. The answer is that there is no fictitious being and we are responsible for our own actions here in this reality. If someone can prove me wrong please do. When i came to this realization i was scared and felt helpless, but came up with other more realistic ways to look at life and the ripple effect that i leave behind. The next time you look up at the Sun you should thank it as it is what truly gave us life and is the center of our existence. But the Christians that enslaved the Americas called the natives who worshiped the Sun Heathens, but the reality is that it is the other way around. Anyway I will shut up now and look forward to hearing your thoughts.
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i com.pleetli a gree wiz yur elokwent kommend!:-)(-:
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"Matthew 2 describes Herod and all of Jerusalem as troubled by the worship of the infant Jesus. Herod then had all of the children of Bethlehem slain. If such extraordinary infanticides of this magnitude had occurred, why didn't anyone write about it? Jerusalem was the center of education and record keeping for the Jewish people. The Romans, of course, also kept many records. Moreover, the gospels mention scribes many times, not only as followers of Jesus but the scribes connected with the high priests. And as for historians, there lived plenty at the time who had the capacity and capability to record, not only insignificant gossip, but significant events, especially from a religious sect who drew so much popular attention through an allegedly famous and infamous Jesus. Take, for example, the works of Philo Judaeus who's birth occurred in 20 B.C.E. and died 50 C.E. He lived as the greatest Jewish-Hellenistic philosopher and historian of the time and lived in the area of Jerusalem during the alleged life of Jesus. He wrote detailed accounts of the Jewish events that occurred in the surrounding area. Yet not once, in all of his volumes of writings, do we read a single account of a Jesus "the Christ." Nor do we find any mention of Jesus in Seneca's (4? B.C.E. - 65 C.E.) writings, nor from the historian Pliny the Elder (23? - 79 C.E.). If, indeed, such a well known Jesus existed, as the gospels allege, does any reader here think it reasonable that, at the very least, the fame of Jesus would not have reached the ears of one of these men? Amazingly, we have not one Jewish, Greek, or Roman writer, even those who lived in the Middle East, much less anywhere else on the earth, who ever mention him during his supposed life time. This appears quite extraordinary, and you will find few Christian apologists who dare mention this embarrassing fact."
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Mocking sugarcreeks writing style!!!!! Hope she is not scared off now.********************************** Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you will still exist, but you have ceased to live. Samuel Clemens
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I actually enjoyed reading sugarcreek's post. She writes a little like the missed heathaafeathaa whose posts were such fun to read. If some gentle teasing is misinterpreted as mockery then of course I apologise!